These Walls

I build walls that
I never wanted,
Keeping me in,
Keeping you out.
We are like Berlin
But the difference is that there exists no candy
To sweeten the isolation. The only solace I find
Is to keep you away from me
Through this demeanor of rudeness.
Do you figure that it’s because I love you?
Do you presume that it’s because I’m done being hurt
Over people?

What I want to do is
To undo the fourty-seven locks that I use to keep the doors closed
And invite you in for perhaps a cup of coffee
Or a pint of
Strawberry Cheesecake Ice-Cream.
But I live in fear of being hurt
Because I am too vulnerable to you. Don’t you know
That all I ever wanted in this short life
Was you? Do you know how much
This sucks for me on my end-
A juvenile way to describe this juvenile love.

How am I supposed to put all my eggs into one basket
And to put my faith in a single person?
Why don’t companies offer insurance
For broken hearts?
For people like me,
For people that will be like me. The only justice I find
Is to take revenge on people that don’t deserve it,
To be the killer queen of men
Because that
Is my only way of finding retribution
For my shattered heart.

These Walls

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